From the beginning of February to now, I've made the following changes:
Body Fat: 41.8% to 35.7%
Fat weight: 113.7 to 96.4
Lean weight: 158.2 to 173.6
Body water: 45.8% to 49.2%
BMI: 43.7 to 43.4
Every one of those numbers is moving in the right direction. My lean weight vs. fat weight has improved, I'm bringing in so much more water, and my percentage of body fat has decreased 6% in 6 weeks!
Yet.... I've only lost 2 lbs on the scale.
Here's what I'm sayin'... The scale is not everything. My body (on the inside) is changing and becoming healthier. And even on the outside... I'm losing inches and my clothes are nearly falling off. If I put all my determination, motivation, and faith onto the scale... I would've given up weeks ago. I really wish other women realized just how much more there is to look for to find "success".
Do I wish that the number on the scale reflected the changes also? Ehhh... Sure.
But I know that if I continue to put in the work and those numbers keep moving in that direction.... It's only a matter of time before the scale reflects it, as well.
I am so excited.
Sunday, March 17, 2013
Saturday, March 2, 2013
Thank You, Biggest Loser
I think I finally finished my last Biggest Loser round. Yesterday was final weigh-in and I did not place or win... But I feel like I got what I needed from the group, finally.
I've been participating in these groups off and on for two years (can't believe it's been that long!). In the beginning it started off (for me) purely as competition. I was motivated by the idea of winning, and I actually did place third in the first round. I've participated 5 or 6 times since then (I lost count) and haven't placed. I always lose weight and get so much support and encouragement, which is the whole point so that's wonderful. But I think I might be finished. I still intend to participate in a group for support/encouragement, because that is always helpful, but the competition part of it, for me, I think is over.
I used to think that to hold myself accountable for what I eat and how much I exercise, I needed to weigh-in once a week. I do think that having some measurable way to keep track of progress is essential, not only to have accountability, but also to give you a boost of confidence and pride when you're feeling like you're getting nowhere. I think I will start measuring in other ways.
When I started out (again) in January, I had it in my mind that I wanted to lose 100 lbs by September. A lot of people looked at me like I was nuts... 1) because most didn't think I had a hundred to lose and 2) because that's a lot of weight to lose in not a lot of time. I still have that number in the back of my mind, and I'm sure it would be so nice to reach that goal by Sept (when we are supposed to go on our trip to Dominican Republic). But I think now instead of "reaching 100 lbs lost", I want to try to find another goal to reach. I think that one is attainable, but I'm realizing more and more that the achievements I reach off the scale are so much more valuable to me, and what I think, ultimately, will be more sustainable.
I "only" lost 18.5 lbs this round in Biggest Loser, whereas the first round I lost 30.2.
But, given the above list... I refuse to feel poorly about that. I refuse to give in to self-doubt & self-deprecation and sabotage all the progress I've made. My body is healthier than it was 8 weeks ago. My mentality towards food & exercise is healthier than it was 8 weeks ago. So, regardless of what the scale says or that I placed 10th in a weight loss competition... I am doing this. I am the person I want to be. It's already happened. Not 100 lbs from now... Right now. This is the person I hoped to become. I am not the healthiest I could be because of the choices of made in the past and how much extra fat I still have to lose. But I've crossed the wall that's been holding me back all this time.
I am so thankful to Braylen's cousin, Carli (who also happened to win this round of BL!!) for starting the competition two years ago, and I'm so blessed by all the women who've come in and out of the group. It's so inspirational to see their journeys and success stories. I pray that we can all continue to take the steps necessary to achieve health & wellness in the next 8 weeks, and the next, and so on...
I've been participating in these groups off and on for two years (can't believe it's been that long!). In the beginning it started off (for me) purely as competition. I was motivated by the idea of winning, and I actually did place third in the first round. I've participated 5 or 6 times since then (I lost count) and haven't placed. I always lose weight and get so much support and encouragement, which is the whole point so that's wonderful. But I think I might be finished. I still intend to participate in a group for support/encouragement, because that is always helpful, but the competition part of it, for me, I think is over.
I used to think that to hold myself accountable for what I eat and how much I exercise, I needed to weigh-in once a week. I do think that having some measurable way to keep track of progress is essential, not only to have accountability, but also to give you a boost of confidence and pride when you're feeling like you're getting nowhere. I think I will start measuring in other ways.
When I started out (again) in January, I had it in my mind that I wanted to lose 100 lbs by September. A lot of people looked at me like I was nuts... 1) because most didn't think I had a hundred to lose and 2) because that's a lot of weight to lose in not a lot of time. I still have that number in the back of my mind, and I'm sure it would be so nice to reach that goal by Sept (when we are supposed to go on our trip to Dominican Republic). But I think now instead of "reaching 100 lbs lost", I want to try to find another goal to reach. I think that one is attainable, but I'm realizing more and more that the achievements I reach off the scale are so much more valuable to me, and what I think, ultimately, will be more sustainable.
- I have gone to the gym 4-6 times per week for the past 8 weeks.
- I drink 6-9 bottles of water per day.
- No more fast food, though we do eat out and I have a "fun meal" usually once per week.
- I no longer crave Diet DP, though I have one occasionally just to remind myself how little I want it and how bloated it makes me feel.
- I'm looking damn good in my clothes (at least, that's what Husband tells me).
- My flexibility is improving as I stretch at the gym.
- I can jog for 5 minutes straight (though I still feel like death, which hopefully I won't very soon).
- My mile has improved from 15:15 to 13:45 in the past 3 weeks.
- The weights when I lift increase every day.
- I attend 2 classes at the gym and at least 2 personal training sessions each week.
- Our lunches are prepared and frozen over the weekend, so I have no excuse during the week.
- Braylen & I have dinner together at work before the gym every night.
I "only" lost 18.5 lbs this round in Biggest Loser, whereas the first round I lost 30.2.
But, given the above list... I refuse to feel poorly about that. I refuse to give in to self-doubt & self-deprecation and sabotage all the progress I've made. My body is healthier than it was 8 weeks ago. My mentality towards food & exercise is healthier than it was 8 weeks ago. So, regardless of what the scale says or that I placed 10th in a weight loss competition... I am doing this. I am the person I want to be. It's already happened. Not 100 lbs from now... Right now. This is the person I hoped to become. I am not the healthiest I could be because of the choices of made in the past and how much extra fat I still have to lose. But I've crossed the wall that's been holding me back all this time.
I am so thankful to Braylen's cousin, Carli (who also happened to win this round of BL!!) for starting the competition two years ago, and I'm so blessed by all the women who've come in and out of the group. It's so inspirational to see their journeys and success stories. I pray that we can all continue to take the steps necessary to achieve health & wellness in the next 8 weeks, and the next, and so on...
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| January 2013 |
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| February 2013 |
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
Whose Blog is it Anyway?
Over the past few days, as I try to ease my way back into posting... I've been brainstorming: What direction do I want to take Unexpected Fortune? I've never had a clear-cut focus to my blog, but somehow, somewhere it shifted... And now I have no idea where it's headed!
It started as a space to write about the highs/lows of grad school and then quickly changed because lezbihonest... Going to grad school is not exactly thrilling... So reading about grad school? Snooze fest!
Please don't hate me for watching Jersey Shore.
So then I started writing about the 17 Day Diet--What we were eating, recipes we liked, setbacks, weigh-in's, etc. That worked for a long time because it's been a struggle for a long time.
Now?
Yes, I still struggle with proper nutrition/exercise. But I feel like I'm getting in a routine (Hallelujah!!) finally and can move on to the next thing.
What is the next thing?
I'm sure I will always write about health/wellness, because it will be a huge part of my life for the rest of my life. If I were to be honest, though, my heart and my mind are definitely focused on something else...
All of these goals I've had in the past (i.e. obtaining a Master's degree, losing weight, building muscle, finding a church home, etc.) have all been a means to an end:
Motherhood.
For as long as I can remember, being "Mom" is what I have wanted. I want all of it. The pregnancy, delivery, sleepless nights, breastfeeding, moments alone rocking them to sleep, learning lessons the hard way, seeing my parents and in-laws light up meeting their grandchild, seeing my husband become Daddy and all the changes that he will make, watching them take their first steps, say their first words, kissing their boo-boo's to make it all better....
I want it so badly. I think about it daily... often hourly.
So when I open up blogger to write a new post... It's often all I want to write about. And I worry "Will I seem selfish?" "Am I obsessing too much?" "Who wants to hear this?" "I should be thankful for what I have."
And I am thankful. SO thankful. I just know what I was meant to become. Some way, some how... I am meant to be a mother.
And I would like to document my journey to motherhood.
So, for now, I'm going to put those worries aside and use this blog for what it's for..... Me.
To be clear, though... I will talk about all those others things (church, health, exercise, BDR, puppies, etc.) as well. I just feel that this new direction is one worth mentioning.
'Night y'all!
It started as a space to write about the highs/lows of grad school and then quickly changed because lezbihonest... Going to grad school is not exactly thrilling... So reading about grad school? Snooze fest!
Please don't hate me for watching Jersey Shore.
So then I started writing about the 17 Day Diet--What we were eating, recipes we liked, setbacks, weigh-in's, etc. That worked for a long time because it's been a struggle for a long time.
Now?
Yes, I still struggle with proper nutrition/exercise. But I feel like I'm getting in a routine (Hallelujah!!) finally and can move on to the next thing.
What is the next thing?
I'm sure I will always write about health/wellness, because it will be a huge part of my life for the rest of my life. If I were to be honest, though, my heart and my mind are definitely focused on something else...
All of these goals I've had in the past (i.e. obtaining a Master's degree, losing weight, building muscle, finding a church home, etc.) have all been a means to an end:
Motherhood.
For as long as I can remember, being "Mom" is what I have wanted. I want all of it. The pregnancy, delivery, sleepless nights, breastfeeding, moments alone rocking them to sleep, learning lessons the hard way, seeing my parents and in-laws light up meeting their grandchild, seeing my husband become Daddy and all the changes that he will make, watching them take their first steps, say their first words, kissing their boo-boo's to make it all better....
I want it so badly. I think about it daily... often hourly.
So when I open up blogger to write a new post... It's often all I want to write about. And I worry "Will I seem selfish?" "Am I obsessing too much?" "Who wants to hear this?" "I should be thankful for what I have."
And I am thankful. SO thankful. I just know what I was meant to become. Some way, some how... I am meant to be a mother.
And I would like to document my journey to motherhood.
So, for now, I'm going to put those worries aside and use this blog for what it's for..... Me.
To be clear, though... I will talk about all those others things (church, health, exercise, BDR, puppies, etc.) as well. I just feel that this new direction is one worth mentioning.
'Night y'all!
Sunday, February 24, 2013
"Driving Slow on Sunday Morning"
Happy Sunday, everyone!
I write this as we get ready to head to church. We haven't been really good about going since the holidays, so we're trying to get back in the habit again.
It's kind of funny, because around the time we stopped going to church was the time we started making good choices for health/exercise. It always makes me wonder... Why is it that not everything can be going well, all at once? Why can't we do really well in one area, without another area falling short?
So we're making a conscious effort to make our spiritual lives be just as much of a priority as our physical well-being. It is, in our minds... But looking at our day to day lives, I'm ashamed to say you wouldn't know it. Occasionally we do well and remember to pray together. And in our hearts, God is number one. But it's so easy to just know and trust in that and not actually build on the relationship. It's like I "check out" on praying, reading devotionals, reading the Word... Because I know Jesus is LORD.... And he knows I know that.... So he knows why I'm not putting time into Him.
Which is just plain ridiculous.
I shouldn't put time into anything else that's not glorifying to Him. And truthfully, the things I'm doing likely are glorifying Him... I just don't regularly take the time to thank Him for it. I need to be better.
I will be better.
_________________________________________________
The crock pot is on and cooking away.... This week's menu:
Pesto Ranch Crock Pot Chicken
Crock Pot Fried Rice
Crock Pot Garlic Lime Chicken
_________________________________________________
I write this as we get ready to head to church. We haven't been really good about going since the holidays, so we're trying to get back in the habit again.
It's kind of funny, because around the time we stopped going to church was the time we started making good choices for health/exercise. It always makes me wonder... Why is it that not everything can be going well, all at once? Why can't we do really well in one area, without another area falling short?
So we're making a conscious effort to make our spiritual lives be just as much of a priority as our physical well-being. It is, in our minds... But looking at our day to day lives, I'm ashamed to say you wouldn't know it. Occasionally we do well and remember to pray together. And in our hearts, God is number one. But it's so easy to just know and trust in that and not actually build on the relationship. It's like I "check out" on praying, reading devotionals, reading the Word... Because I know Jesus is LORD.... And he knows I know that.... So he knows why I'm not putting time into Him.
Which is just plain ridiculous.
I shouldn't put time into anything else that's not glorifying to Him. And truthfully, the things I'm doing likely are glorifying Him... I just don't regularly take the time to thank Him for it. I need to be better.
I will be better.
_________________________________________________
The crock pot is on and cooking away.... This week's menu:
Pesto Ranch Crock Pot Chicken
Crock Pot Fried Rice
Crock Pot Garlic Lime Chicken
_________________________________________________
BDR & I took a walk yesterday to the "falls" in our new town. It feels so good to call this place "home". Love this life we have together!!
Friday, February 22, 2013
Well, This is Awkward...
I never know how to start a blog post when it's been weeks or months since the last time I've written. Do you mention the time away? Do you ignore it? Should I feel guilty or should I not feel guilty?
Who the heck knows...
I haven't written because I've just been laying low for a while. As much as I love and appreciate all of the feedback I get from this blog and from facebook, there are some things I just don't want other people's opinions about. Husband and I have made a LOT of changes lately. Things are just starting to calm down (relatively), and I finally feel like we're developing that new "normal" I've been so looking forward to.
But back to being away for so long and then trying to write a post...
I feel like I need to play catch up and explain what's been happening these last few months. But let's be honest...
Who the heck knows...
I haven't written because I've just been laying low for a while. As much as I love and appreciate all of the feedback I get from this blog and from facebook, there are some things I just don't want other people's opinions about. Husband and I have made a LOT of changes lately. Things are just starting to calm down (relatively), and I finally feel like we're developing that new "normal" I've been so looking forward to.
But back to being away for so long and then trying to write a post...
I feel like I need to play catch up and explain what's been happening these last few months. But let's be honest...
So in a nutshell (because you know how much I love lists):
- I'm still loving my job/coworkers/clients. Like, seriously? It's unbelievable, this company I work for. I wish everyone had this opportunity... I feel ridiculously blessed.
- Our home is still just so perfect for us. We have zero complaints (outside of poor cell/internet reception). I pray that we can stay here forever!
- Husband is still in the process of finding a job/career he loves. We're both just so happy he's not having to do night shifts anymore. It's doing wonders for our relationship!
- We found a church home that we really love and were going regularly for a long while. Since the holidays, we're struggling to get back in the swing of things, but hopefully it'll fall back into place soon.
- I'm finally getting my butt together on the health/exercise front. I see a personal trainer twice a week, which has seriously been so much fun. My trainer is unbelievable and kicks my butt!! I love it!! Total, I work out for an hour 4-5x/week. I've been making tons of crock pot meals each weekend, so we never have an excuse of "not wanting to cook". Since January 4 I've lost 19 lbs. This time around, the weight is not coming off as quickly, and for a while I was worried. But now I see that it is coming off, it's coming off at a healthy/sustainable pace, I'm physically feeling so much better, and I'm just.. happy. It's not easy, but nothing worth having in life usually is.
- Braylen and I are going on a trip to Dominican Republic in September (which is a HUGE motivation on the health/wellness front). After which time, we will start trying to grow our family. This is probably what I'm most excited about and could write 10 posts over, so I'm just going to stop there.
- Last and probably most importantly... The puppies are doing just fine. Luke & Leia love the new house... Big back yard, big windows to bark at the golfers across the street... They love it!
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| Luke in his back yard & Leia on her favorite perch |
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| My sweet baby girl giving sad eyes to me. |
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| Luke cooling off from being outside. |
Obviously the dog obsession hasn't changed (did anyone realistically expect it to?).
Life is fantastic and I have no complaints.
I doubt that I will consistently update, as apparently I suck at this blogging thing. So, just as a warning... My posts will likely always be sporadic and random.
Have a Happy Friday!
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
New House
It's so funny to me how out of practice I am with posting. I'm sitting here racking my brain trying to think of what to do next online, and it finally dawned on me... Hey, I could update my blog! ha. It's been so long, I just don't even think of it!
It's also been occurring to me lately that Braylen and I are still newlyweds, at least, in my opinion. I guess I don't really know the time limit on what constitutes a "newlywed", but we've only been married 2 years, and a majority of that we haven't spent together due to night shifts and grad school. I say all that to say, I feel like we're just starting out. Or starting again, I guess. We're in this new house, in a new state, with new people all around us, trying to find a new routine in a new environment... And it just feels like the fresh start we'd been hoping for! I truly feel that all the headache and stress that was Grad School was worth it. (Can you believe I just said that?) I am SO GLAD it's finished, but I'm SO GLAD I did it.
Speaking of new house... Here it is!
It's also been occurring to me lately that Braylen and I are still newlyweds, at least, in my opinion. I guess I don't really know the time limit on what constitutes a "newlywed", but we've only been married 2 years, and a majority of that we haven't spent together due to night shifts and grad school. I say all that to say, I feel like we're just starting out. Or starting again, I guess. We're in this new house, in a new state, with new people all around us, trying to find a new routine in a new environment... And it just feels like the fresh start we'd been hoping for! I truly feel that all the headache and stress that was Grad School was worth it. (Can you believe I just said that?) I am SO GLAD it's finished, but I'm SO GLAD I did it.
Speaking of new house... Here it is!
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| Home Sweet Home! |
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| Dining Room |
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| Living Room |
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| Kitchen |
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| Master Bedroom |
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| Master Bathroom |
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| Guest Bathroom |
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| Guest Bedroom #1 |
I have more pictures, but don't want to upload them all on here. If you're interested, visit my facebook! We're loving every second we spend in this house. I'm hard-pressed to find things to complain about, ha. There's just not much I can find!
Well, I guess that's my update for the night? Geez, this feels so unnatural to me after being gone for so long. Hoping to get back in the swing of things soon!
'Night y'all!!
Saturday, September 1, 2012
Loving Myself
Hi! Remember me? Sorry it's been so awfully long. Braylen and I recently moved to a new town (in another state) so we've been without internet for quite some time. That, and things have just been so hectic with moving and starting a new job, I didn't have the motivation to post from Husband's iPhone... It never dawned on me to do so anyway!
I started my new job on July 9th and have loved every minute. God's truly been blessing us right and left. Our old home hasn't sold yet, so that's still a huge concern, but otherwise... More often than not, I look around and think "Is this really my life?". I feel unbelievably blessed and so thankful to be where I am.
That isn't to say that things are 100% perfect. Like I said, our old home still hasn't sold, so that's a stressful situation. More importantly, as you could have guessed and I'm sure all assumed, my diet and exercise haven't been on point in quite a long time. I haven't weighed myself in probably 2 months, so I don't know how much damage I've done, but I think it's safe to say I'm probably right back to where I was when I started this craziness in January 2011. I'm not proud or happy about that. I don't have any resolve about it... So I'm not blowing it off and just saying "It is what it is". I have really struggled with myself over it lately. I worked really hard to lose that 60 pounds and to know I probably have gained it all back is really frustrating. It also shows me that I obviously wasn't doing things right the first time. So I guess I need to change things up?
I'm thinking, at least in the beginning, I'm not going to weigh-in like I was. I don't think I'm going to take pictures. I don't think I'm going to make a production about it. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that, and I do miss the support and encouragement I receive when I post a picture showing progress... But to me that makes it all seem temporary.. Like a fleeting victory. The changes I need to make must be subtle and gradual... Not unlike how I gained weight. I didn't gain all this extra weight overnight, and it won't come off overnight. I want to focus more on gradual and manageable changes that I can make each day. I don't want to become overwhelmed and feel like I don't know who I am anymore... Like I have in the past.
I have no idea if it will work. Hell, it probably won't.
But I have to be at least the tiniest bit happy that I'm still trying. Prior to last year, if losing weight didn't work within a couple of months, I just threw in the towel and moved on. I know now that this will always be a part of my life. It's always on the back of my mind. I'm not always happy that it's on the back of my mind because my attitude is so horrible... Most of the time all I feel is massive amounts of guilt and shame for how horribly I've treated my body. Someday hopefully it won't be a nagging feeling... It'll be more positive.
As you can see, my mind is royally messed up right now. So it's probably a good thing I haven't updated in so long, ha. Gave you a nice long break from this garbage I've got going on.
Not sure how I went from talking about how good things are to talking about how awful I feel about myself but that is the honest to goodness truth.
I love my job, my husband, my new home, my new town, my new friends, and my family. But I am having the hardest time loving myself.
I sincerely hope you all are doing well. Now that our internet is on, I will try to be better at keeping up with UE. It's helpful for me to write... Helps keep my honest. Plus, I miss you guys.
God bless.
'Night y'all!
I started my new job on July 9th and have loved every minute. God's truly been blessing us right and left. Our old home hasn't sold yet, so that's still a huge concern, but otherwise... More often than not, I look around and think "Is this really my life?". I feel unbelievably blessed and so thankful to be where I am.
That isn't to say that things are 100% perfect. Like I said, our old home still hasn't sold, so that's a stressful situation. More importantly, as you could have guessed and I'm sure all assumed, my diet and exercise haven't been on point in quite a long time. I haven't weighed myself in probably 2 months, so I don't know how much damage I've done, but I think it's safe to say I'm probably right back to where I was when I started this craziness in January 2011. I'm not proud or happy about that. I don't have any resolve about it... So I'm not blowing it off and just saying "It is what it is". I have really struggled with myself over it lately. I worked really hard to lose that 60 pounds and to know I probably have gained it all back is really frustrating. It also shows me that I obviously wasn't doing things right the first time. So I guess I need to change things up?
I'm thinking, at least in the beginning, I'm not going to weigh-in like I was. I don't think I'm going to take pictures. I don't think I'm going to make a production about it. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that, and I do miss the support and encouragement I receive when I post a picture showing progress... But to me that makes it all seem temporary.. Like a fleeting victory. The changes I need to make must be subtle and gradual... Not unlike how I gained weight. I didn't gain all this extra weight overnight, and it won't come off overnight. I want to focus more on gradual and manageable changes that I can make each day. I don't want to become overwhelmed and feel like I don't know who I am anymore... Like I have in the past.
I have no idea if it will work. Hell, it probably won't.
But I have to be at least the tiniest bit happy that I'm still trying. Prior to last year, if losing weight didn't work within a couple of months, I just threw in the towel and moved on. I know now that this will always be a part of my life. It's always on the back of my mind. I'm not always happy that it's on the back of my mind because my attitude is so horrible... Most of the time all I feel is massive amounts of guilt and shame for how horribly I've treated my body. Someday hopefully it won't be a nagging feeling... It'll be more positive.
As you can see, my mind is royally messed up right now. So it's probably a good thing I haven't updated in so long, ha. Gave you a nice long break from this garbage I've got going on.
Not sure how I went from talking about how good things are to talking about how awful I feel about myself but that is the honest to goodness truth.
I love my job, my husband, my new home, my new town, my new friends, and my family. But I am having the hardest time loving myself.
I sincerely hope you all are doing well. Now that our internet is on, I will try to be better at keeping up with UE. It's helpful for me to write... Helps keep my honest. Plus, I miss you guys.
God bless.
'Night y'all!
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